


Hate to See Your Heart Break

by bethanybee25



Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV), The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: Angst, F/F, F/M, Heartbreak, M/M, Manipulation, Multi, Pain
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-12-16
Updated: 2015-03-13
Packaged: 2018-03-01 19:15:00
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,530
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2784557
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bethanybee25/pseuds/bethanybee25
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Begins about where the end of Thor: The Dark World left off and explains Amora's absence from the MCU. Amora the Enchantress has been suffering her banishment on Earth for 800 years (give or take) but on her return to Asgard she finds everything has changed. No-one is the same person they were all those years ago and Amora must find where she fits in this new game where the King is a master player, the Knight is suffering in silence and the Pawns are ready to riot while an unknown force threatens to bring the End of All Days.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

The night was just the same as it had been for weeks and months and the years and years made of constant bar tending routines all night and sleeping (alone or with some fuckboy off the street) all day. Walking home should have cleared her head but instead all she could focus on was the wreck of her life, doing a dead-end job in a dive bar, having to teach endless leagues of men how ‘nice tits’ is not a compliment. God, she hated that job. Not that she was unused to a lack of respect. But to have it from Migardians was nearly too much to bear.  
  
Her apartment complex hid in the shadows of the streetlights. She always liked that. If anyone from home should find her here, she would positively die of embarrassment. The click of her heels on pavement (a powerful sound she’d always loved) never made her deaf to other sounds. There city noise was different here but still bittersweet. Comforting in a way that still pulled on the heartstrings with tweezers. Walking up the stairs to her apartment still the thoughts swirled around her head, swimming like goldfish, and round in circles. Truly her life had no meaning, no goal, nothing to work towards, save the cold stone of revenge that lay in the bottom of her heart, mind and stomach. No, she refused to give in. To give him the satisfaction of her dying, defeated and alone.  
  
For too long she’d been trying to go home but as it became more and more difficult, the bright light at the end of the tunnel seemed to run further and further out of her reach. It was no more than a pinprick of light, a star that may as well be light-years away to her. There were too many questions and possibilities to form any coherent plan. It was near impossible to return but if she couldn't stay much longer. She herself was in danger of revealing who she was, in a fit of anger or desperation. And outside her control she too was in danger. She used to know who to hide but the news had been running stories about SHIELD’s collapse for months and she had next to no clue as to who was taking over their job. The army, the FBI or even HYDRA could be looking at her right now. Staying on Earth was not an option but she had no way of getting off it. She opened the door as a real monster of a thought crossed her mind. Did she really belong anywhere? Was she just a nobody from nowhere?  
  
No, she knew who she was. Taking off her jacket and shoes and lazily dropping them on the floor she mentally shook herself. She belonged back home, the home she’d been cruelly driven from. Damn them for giving her no justice. Damn them for torturing her. Damn them for making her think these thoughts. A swig a Jack Daniels fueled the building emotion in her. She pined for home, pitifully like a kicked dog and for the few she’d loved that were left behind. The few that have never looked for her or tried to save her. She cursed them all and lifted the bottle near vertical over her head. She’d drunk half of it last night and she had wanted to save some for tomorrow but now she was spiraling. Drinking straight from the bottle helped to numb her insides make the homesickness more bearable. Those were her three states now: burning anger, frosty hate and vengeance or numbness. She consoled herself; there is always more drink to steal from the bar. Dropping ungracefully on to the sofa she could not help but survey this sad excuse for a place she lived in and refused to call home.  
  
Her apartment is small and dirty with mold creeping in under the windows and in the corners of the living room. The finest minimum wage can buy. Minimum wage did not buy her sofa or coffee table, which like the bed in the other room, were ‘borrowed’ from ex-lovers who had no desire to ever see her again. The only other thing that decorates the grey square that is the living room was stolen – that dinosaur laptop that uses her neighbors internet (not that they would ever bother her about that, like the landlord they had an agreement). She had been honest and brought the plate, bowl, cup and cutlery for the kitchen. She only had enough for herself for necessity and to discourage any visitors that made it through the rest of her defences and decided they rather like her in a kiss-the-ground-she-walks-on adoration way. Thankfully Migardians were not so stupid they couldn't realise when she said she’d destroy them, she meant it. The kitchen itself was so big one person could fit between the sink and the set of grey-green cupboards. The oven door almost opened fully but she was never a domestic goddess and food was free at the bar. She’d never have the money to cook everyday anyway.  
  
In keeping with nightly ritual after a hour or so something in her pulled her upright and in to the bedroom to change in to the vest and yoga pants that served as pyjamas. She was tired by the time she came back out and longed to crawl beneath the covers and lie or sleep beneath them until her shift tomorrow evening. But the ritual was not complete without searching a little more, and it chipped away in her mind if she didn't do it. So she opened the laptop (why hadn't she taken a better one?) and started.  
  
Google was no less helpful than usual but of course by now she knew all about Jane Foster that brilliant beautiful young astrophysicist and her relationship with Thor. His own superhero crew and heroic acts in London, New York and New Mexico. The sightings of two otherworldly strong women again in New Mexico and not far from the first – she recognised the descriptions of them both and cursed them both equally for each’s stupidity. That crazy horned Asgardian god that tried to take over the world with a wormhole, a blue cube and an alien army. She’d missed all these chances and even now they were all home when she was not. She hated them for forgetting her but even in her promises to repay them all for their sieve-like memories a little voice told her she would crumble if she saw them again. Nor could she deny she hated herself for not being faster, smarter, better. Perhaps tonight would be another night to curl up in bed around the Jack Daniels and drink herself to sleep. She found herself going over and over all these articles and news reports and blurry pictures she’d memorised a thousand times before. She promised herself long ago that she would not be a weak little girl and give in to her bad thoughts that came from a dark corner of her mind. She would do whatever it took to get herself back home, however long it may take would take but it was so difficult to keep this promise. She’d been banished centuries ago but the event was just as fresh as if it had been yesterday. She would carry that little girl as long as she would live.  
  
The darkness of night was starting to fade in to sunrise when some of her questions were answered and a pan began to form. She had found that Thor was still in London with his little doctor and she knew she could use this to her advantage. All she needed was to find where they were to finish it. She’d checked Foster’s Facebook and her mothers and was currently on one of dozens of Thor fan sites. There was dozens of posts that all said that Thor was definitely living in and had been seen in just yesterday every single borough of London. A link had brought her to a chat about the address she scrolled through quickly and weighing which place had come up more than any other. Calmly she scorched it on to her brain, closed all but one tab, erasing her history and running to pack what she would need to pull it off. All it would take was getting to England and Amora would be home.


	2. Home

Jane had spent the last week babbling on about the science behind Bifrost and Yggdrasil and it was starting to make his head hurt. He often tried to talk about whether he'd met this Dr Koslov before when he bought any of the many, many trays of coffee that fuelled their days in to the living room / makeshift laboratory but was drowned out or waved away. They were clearly on the edge of a breakthrough in something Asgard had probably discovered years ago but Thor had so little opportunity to tell her that and he knew it would only upset her anyway. It was unwelcome as his worries about whether it was healthy to drink nothing but coffee for 24hrs a day for three straight days. There was something ever so familiar about this Dr Koslov - he only caught it occasionally when she gestured or when her voice when she was excited about a discussion involving interstellar medicinal technology and its impact on Earth's ageing population. Only once he saw her smile and it gave him a strange feeling of homesickness, like he'd known a girl who looked just like that back home but then he'd known lots of girls back home and they all smiled beautifully.  
  
The trip to Asgard had been suggested by Jane when their speed of light pace of thinking had slowed to that of a normal working scientist. Darcy was immediately on board and it took very little time to convince Erik. Thor was the most staunch opposition but he went along with it if only to satisfy Jane and he told himself they wouldn't stay long. He had no way of knowing how his father would react, let only the Warriors and Sif whom he only made the smallest quickest goodbyes to. Of course he intended to return but years later when everything had died down and the Kingdom was wholly if not mostly rebuilt. Asgard had the reminder of the past and Loki and Mother and the kingship he'd refused. Earth helped to distract from the grief. Without Jane he doubted he would have survived all his turbulent emotions but she helped him to open up, to talk, to remember. She never ceases to amaze me he thinks, in whatever she does.  
  
It was agreed by all that only Thor, Jane and Dr Koslov should go to Asgard but the doctors were to take a camera andbring back some samples so Erik and Darcy would prepare the lab. Thor doubted a little as to whether Heimdall would open the Bifrost for him, especially him with two humans. And he did not trust this Dr Koslov, maybe it was his own feelings of déjà vu getting in the way but it didn't feel right to him. Perhaps he would have trusted Jane to catalogue and analyse his world but he would be keeping a close eye on the other doctor just in case. He wasn't stupid, he knew when to trust his gut.  
  
Oh poor darling Thor, thinks Amora as soon as they step in the Conservatory, you should know better. Letting a Migardian you don't know enter Asgard. Don't you trust your gut anymore? Although I'm glad you didn't. How love has made you blind. Heimdall knows. She saw it in his face, a guarded shock difficult to detect (as any emotion is with Heimdall) but then he sees all, he knew when he brought them up. Thor still has that strange searching look on his face. At least Jane can't see it, she's too busy gushing with how amazing the Bifrost his. It's been a week and God it will be nice to have some rest from her incessant chirping about SCIENCE, SCIENCE, SCIENCE. The girl's got conviction she'll give her that. Maybe that's why he loves her, excitement flies from every fibre of the little Migardian. And she is pretty. But then so is she, she thinks. Or she will be when these clothes are changed and the wig and this godawful make-up come off. They are suffocating. So she peels the mousy brownness from her scalp as Heimdall tells her "I have alerted the Einherjar".  
  
He shouldn't have trusted, he shouldn't of bought her here. Of course she was in disguise, of course she wanted something. But who is this girl that shakes her blonde curls out while flirting with the Gatekeeper? "A couple of jumped up boys with sticks was never something I couldn't handle darling" she grins. I know, he thinks, of course I do but what is her name? Who are you? The voice was a lie too just like her hair, her clothes, her very face was a lie. She sheds layers of ill-fitting baggy clothes with the wig and her inner self is wrapped in a dress of green that floats like air around her, accentuating all her curves. She smiles, it lights up her face and suddenly it hits him. Amora. The realisation of her is so abrupt, her name nearly escapes his throat as his mouth falls open. He is shocked beyond belief that not only is she here now but he forgot about her. Forgot she ever existed, forgot that he... No the past is the past and that would not be good to talk about with Jane, who is just as paralysed as he looking at the goddess in front of them roll her limbs like she was reborn. It is only Heimdell who doesn't bat an eyelid but that, stars above, is a tiny smile on his face. A Gatekeeper should not be pleased to see a banished witch and yet he is. Stranger things have happened or Thor hopes they have.  
  
She's star of the show and after 800 years, God does it feel good. She is childish and self-centred, but those are things to fix later. It's so good to be back! She skips and she twirls round that conservatory, in the free-flowing dress that were always just her style. But she can't twirl past Thor, how rude of him to get in the way.  
  
If she hadn't moved he probably would have stayed there transfixed but she broke the spell and Thor wasn't happy to see her, he was angry. Her smile is sweet until you knows what it hides and she hid far too much in the past and now after a week of lying through her pearly white teeth, now she has the audacity to celebrate. He has to drop Mjolnir or else he might just use it to break her jaw, take out all those pretty pearly white teeth. Instead he grips her under the arm and hisses "You shoudn't be here".  
"I had to come home" she breathes in his face, at least she knows better than to raise a hand against him. "You lied to me" he shakes her a little, but it's difficult with them chest to chest like this. "You forgot me" she spits back and they are left at a stalemate, each as right as the other.  
  
"Forgot who Thor, do you know her?"Jane's been pretty blindsided up until now, but their faces are so close together, there is only a sliver of light between them and all she can think is whether they looked like that, Thor and Jane, when he left her in New Mexico. "Yes, I do, I mean I did" he answers, all flustered. He looks so embarrassed a part of her wish she hasn't asked. But he releses the blonde from his death grip and focuses on Jane. "It was a long time ago, and it is a long story, how I know her" he pauses "I am not sure you would want to hear it." So she was another of the many girls he'd 'known' in Asgard." But why did she ..." Jane readdresses the question to the girl herself "But why did you lie? If you're Asgardian you could have just called and the Bridge would have come, why lie - just to have some fun?" Thor trying to quieten her is only making her more worked up. "No, I want an answer, were you just playing with us? Just like Lo..."  
  
The mortal stops find sentence and gets this pained look on her face, turns toward Thor as if she just stabbed him. "Just like Loki you mean? We have similarities. Where is he by the way?" The room is colder somehow, more tense after the mention of his name. Heimdall looks more solemn than usually and she thinks the mortal is trying to comfort Thor? It's making her nervous. "Thor, where is he?" she asks tentatively. He won't answer. "Thor?"' she hates how small her voice sounds and that sinking feeling inside her that something is terribly terribly wrong. Her thoughts are getting overcrowded, shouting, screaming worst case sceinarios in her head. Fine, if they won't tell her, she thinks as she runs out of the Conservatory and down the bridge, she'll go find him because Loki has to be here. He just has to be.


	3. An Empty Room

It might have been 800 years but she still knows the way to Loki's room. She's a better runner than Thor so even if he was close behind, she knows she has some precious minutes before he finds her. She is (or was its been a while though Earth has made her leaner) the best runner in Asgard and Thor has to send his Migradian back to Earth first, so 10 minutes. She can lose him in 10 minutes. As she runs through the palace she tries to ignore how there are less flowers (please Gods let Frigga be alright) and how the people stare, maybe they remember. It was a hard trial to forget. Her thoughts still flit around like anger little bees made of what if, what if, what if. She pushes her feet to run faster than her thoughts. Her heart beats fast and not just from the run, fear laces her veins.  
  
The brass doors are just the same, they look thick but are not quite as sound-proof as you'd think. He's so quiet anyway so maybe he's still there. She's been growing more sure while she was running and now she grasps as some last straws of hope. She throws open the doors and the noise they make against the wall is jarring but she doesn't care if anyone finds her, she didn't even bother trying to lose Thor, she just has to know. And now she does. There is no light, no fire, no candle, nothing in the room to suggest life has been here recently. He isn't sat anywhere with his nose in a book, he doesn't emerge from the bathroom to ask what the hell she this she's doing. Nothing  
  
The room looks gray, devoid. His bed and drawers and a lot of books are missing. Maybe he just moved to another part of the castle, maybe he took Thor's suite, maybe he just moved somewhere else, maybe he's on a trip somewhere. Maybe he went for a while, that's why it doesn't even smell like him. Maybe that's why his clothes are nowhere and everything is packed away. Thor doesn't even speak when he finds her there, she doesn't either. How sad she looks as she shakes her head and the tears fill,her eyes. She wants to beg him to say it's not true, tell her he's hiding somewhere waiting but his eyes have no answer. They just look accepting, pitying, sorry she had to find out like this. Her hands are already pressed to her mouth as she chokes out some tiny sobs and the tears start to stream down her lovely face and drip on to her chest and clothes. Thor should leave and try as she might to tell him that, the words betray her and turn in to sobs. At least he shuts the doors to save her embarrassment from the rest of the castle.  
  
Damn that thunder god's kind heart. The wailing and the screaming feels not only horrendously ugly but horrendously embassing. She'd much rather be alone right now but he must know how it feels to be in this state, how later she will wish she had someone. He hugs her when she starts to cry, keeps her upright when she collapses in to him, pulls her in to his lap on the sofa and tries to soothe her, even a little. Even lets her hit his arms and chest, to be angry at someone because she needs to be angry right now. He only leaves when she tells him to, far later and in the dark he doesn't look back. 


End file.
